_ Hарочно не придумаешь (2:5077/15.22) ________________________ HUMOR.FILTERED _
From : Boris Paleev 2:5020/113 26 Feb 98 23:15:14
Subj : for humor.filtered (selected by Jet Fraer)
________________________________________________________________________________
*__________________________________________________________________
* Area : RU.LINUX (RU.LINUX)
* From : Anthony Dragunov, 2:5010/1.111 (23 Feb 98 12:26)
* To : All,
* Subj : 8-)
*__________________________________________________________________
@RealName: Hезабор Бандлов :)
* Forwarded by Anthony Dragunov (2:5010/1.111)
* Area : CH.UNIX (-- Unix -- Челябинская)
* From : Aleksey I Zavilohin, 2:5010/46.29 (Пятница Февраль 20 1998 21:09)
* To : All
* Subj : 8-)
RTFM(1) RTFM(1)
NAME
rtfm - a response for easy questions from clueless lusers
SYNOPSIS
rtfm [ -p ] [ -h ] [ -d option ] [ -i interval ] [ -a
action ] [ -q luser]
DESCRIPTION
rtfm is a command for system administrators to use in
dealing with new users. rtfm is useful for dealing with
users having trouble with their pictures downloaded from
alt.binaries.pictures.erotica. rtfm will continue to run
until killed by hand, using `kill processid'. rtfm can be
invoked by anyone who has enough of a clue to know what a
man page is.
OPTIONS
-p Give the answer in a polite fashion.
-h Tell the clueless luser to go to hell. Used with
the -p option, they'll look forward to the trip.
-d option
Debug mode using option where option is one of the
following:
query Ask the luser what part of rtfm that he or
she does not understand.
planet Ask what planet the luser is from.
literacy Ask the luser if the luser can read.
english Ask the luser if the luser understands
English.
Mac Ask the luser if the luser has ever used a com-
puter other than a Macintosh.
Nintendo Same as the Mac option, but slightly more
harsh.
-i interval
Enable within interval seconds. interval is the
time between a luser asking the same damn fool
question. This option must be activated for the -a
option. It stores the time of the question in
/tmp/luser and checks that file each time that rtfm
is activated. interval is a number of minutes, of
the form xxx.xx where each x is a decimal digit.
The default is 5.00 minutes.
-a action
This defines some action to be taken in the event
GNU Utilities July 27, 1997 1
RTFM(1) RTFM(1)
that the -i flag condition is met. action can be
defined either at the flag level or by a file. The
options for flags are as follows:
scream Let out a scream of utter frustration.
hair Rip out your hair in total frustration.
rm Automatic command ran in lusers home directory.
It can have an addition -rf flag added.
ignore Ignore the luser.
warn Warn the other sysadmins.
forward Forward to CNS advising. Particullary if
the complaint is /dev/null is full.
kill Kill all the lusers processes.
FILE=file.name Use a file to define a course of
actions. This can be any executeable file except
those using ksh, which no god-fearing right-think-
ing sysadmin would be caught using lest he be
struck down by the wrath of God.
-q luser
Query file /etc/luser to see if luser is a real
luser or a first time luser.
FILES
/etc/luser
SEE ALSO
mr.biff(2),
BUGS
rtfm only checks /tmp/luser when the -a option is speci-
fied and after the -i option is invoked. Otherwise /tmp
would fill up rapidly on many systems. Also, core may dump
if the -a FILE= option is anatomically impossible.
GNU Utilities July 27, 1997 2
--
Всего
villain
mailto:villain@ems.chel.su -- http://villain.ems.chel.su/~villain
-+- ifmail v.2.12-tx8.6
:nigirO * --== villain ==-- (2:5010/46.29@fidonet)
Hello All!
Best regards, Boris
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